Smile for the Camera, Santa!
by DemonicPiano
Summary: Tino is a mall Santa, so when a man and (what he assumes to be) his son approach him for holiday pictures, he expects the kid to sit on his lap, right? RIGHT!


_Author's Note- Great. Another damned Christmas time SuFin story. Damn it all. When will I stop this madness?_

* * *

"Here are your photos! I hope you like them! Happy Holidays!"

Tino petted the artificial beard against his face in mock thought as his assistant waved away the last of the families waiting in line to get pictures of 'Old Saint Nick.' "What time is it, Eduard?"

Eduard folded back his sleeve and glanced to his watch. "It's almost four. We should wrap this up any second now."

"Why not now?" Tino raised his arms in the air and let out a very un-Santa-like squeak with his stretch. He was just about to push himself from the couch he had been fidgeting on for two hours now, but then a youthful voice frantically called out from somewhere in the mall.

"Santa! Santa Claus! Hey!" An older child jogged down the busy intersection, almost ramming and getting rammed by passersby just to get a glimpse of the jolly red man. Someone who must have been a guardian or father figure kept pace on long legs, and clamped a hand on his shoulder when the boy almost ran and toppled over the fence shielding 'Santa' and the public.

"Santa!" The boy gasped in excitement and for air, "We weren't too late, Papa! I want pictures!"

Eduard raised his eyebrows in surprise, and quickly glanced to Tino's poorly disguised distraught. "Oh, yeah, we are still in business, I guess..."

"It's all right," the man accompanying the child rumbled, "If you're closed, then-"

"Papa, no!" The boy pushed against the fence to stomp his feet on the ground. Eduard seemed startled as the fake barrier shook with the child's might. "You said we were gonna get pictures! _You promised!_ "

"How 'bout some ice cream? Or...uh..."

The boy reached in his coat pocket and pulled out a phone larger than his hands and waved it at Eduard. "We don't even need fancy cameras! We can just take pictures on here!"

"Peter..." His dad warned, and the mall workers took a collective "Eep!" from his darkening expression.

'Santa' flapped a hand in dismissal, and put on his best jolly-filled voice, "No, no! It is all okay! Come get pictures! It's the holiday after all!"

Eduard performed a double take to Tino patting his fake beard again, but then gave a little shake to put on his best customer service smile as he turned to Peter's father. "Would you like for me to take the pictures, or would you-"

He never seen a man that size move so fast. Peter jeered in delight despite the mall worker's obvious horror to the adult man now residing on 'Santa's' lap. "Yeah! Stay right there, Papa!"

"Oh, my..." Tino choked out, and slapped on a pained smile through his fake white curls when the man took a quick glance behind himself. "Ho, ho, ha...here I thought that your boy would be the one to...you know..."

Peter stomped a foot again. "Papa, the camera's showing my face! I don't want it on my face!"

Eduard could only scoot backwards into a decorated evergreen, little by little to hide himself and the laughter threatening to burst out of him.

"The button...top right corner."

"What? Oh! There we go! Smile, Papa!"

Peter's father did not, but he held up a hand with two fingers sticking up, a peace sign, courtesy of the Americans. Tino could only grin and die on the inside and underneath the man's weight on his one leg. The internal suffering must have leaked out from a tiny wince, as the man glimpsed behind himself again.

"Y'right?"

Tino's eyes shifted away from the man's piercing gaze, and squawked, "Uh, what?"

"Y'don't look all right." The boy's father hung his head. "Too heavy. Here," he shifted off of Tino's lap - sweet relief! - onto the other couch cushion. He then patted his own legs with the calmest expression ever, as if he was not grunting madness, "Come sit on my lap 'stead."

"Bwahaha-! Sorry! Sorry!" Eduard shouted, laughing as well as being terrified as he shoved open the Exit gate and ran off into the crowd, abandoning his post, and abandoning Santa.

"I-I mean, I might be heavy, too," Tino chuckled, and patted the belt around his belly. "So many cookies this season!"

"I heard low-fat an' gluten free are in this year," the man coaxed a large hand behind his back to urge him to scoot onto his legs.

"Are you sure, ah...Mister...uh..."

"Berwald. Or you can call me Papa, like Peter does."

"Okay!" 'Santa' exclaimed a bit too pitched. "Berwald it is." Nice to know the name of the guy bringing him the absolute joy of the Christmas season...all sarcasm intended. Getting jabbed in the cheek by a candy cane would have been better then this, but a job was a job, so when Peter obliviously called out for his dad and Tino to smile, he held up both hands and copied Berwald's previous 'peace' gesture.

"Yeah! Woo!" Peter hopped in place and tried to press the capture button at the same time. "I'm going to send these all to my friends!"

Tino almost begged him not to, but bit his tongue instead.

"Peter," the boy's dad warned, "Y'won't get a clear shot if y'keep bouncin' like that."

Eduard actually returned at the moment, and almost dropped to the floor, either from laughter or fainting - he was not sure yet - at the sight of Santa sitting on a client's lap. Luckily, he brought a savior with him, a mall cop, who immediately put his hands on his waist and called, "Sir, you can't have the Santas sitting on your lap for the photos."

Peter asked, "Why not?!"

"Uh..." the security guard scratched at his nose. "Safety reasons."

Berwald nodded. "That's fair."

'Santa' seized the opportunity to leap off of the man's lap and nonchalantly brushed his gloved hands down his suit. "Well, that's all for today folks!" He quickly said, "Hope you have a nice day and bye!"

Peter bounced as his father left the pen, and held up the phone. "Look!"

"Yeah, I see. Come on, 'bout that ice cream I was talkin' earlier..."

"Okay!" The kid had to be on a sugar rush or something. He turned to 'Santa' and proclaimed, "Next year, you can sit on my lap!"

"Oh!" Tino exclaimed in feign delight. "Thank you..."

Eduard called in relief as the small family turned to blend into the crowd, "Goodbye! Come again, and happy holidays!"

Tino smacked his arm, making his friend and the security guard jump. "No! Don't say that! What if they _do_ come back?!"

"If that happens again, then _I_ definitely got to get pictures."

"Eduard!"

Still, now across the mall, Berwald could not help but be a little irked. Tens and tens of people flock to sit on Santa's lap, but when he offered the guy a break to sit on his lap...mall cops forbid.

* * *

 _A.N.- Happy holidays...for the third year in a row!_


End file.
